Fish Loving No More
My first introduction to Fish Love was during my family session whilst in treatment. A selfish love, as I understood it, based on what I’m getting rather than a genuine concern for the other. Dan, the facilitator, actually went there and something in me woke up that day. I was using my ex-husband, enabling him so that he could enable me. Painful to discover that the only real relationship I’d had up until that time was not based on love at all, I was in a symbiotic relationship which bordered on parasitic. Dagger to the soul. Good thing I felt it, there was hope.
Stumbling into the fellowship through a psychiatric institution in March of 2021 was a huge opportunity for me, the day I got introduced back into the world of the living. I worked the 12 Steps with 3 different sponsors, vigorously. I was blessed to have a male sponsor as my 4th sponsor, this time I was ready to look at my disease as it pertains to my relationships with men and all the groundwork from previous rounds had been set. It was still excruciating to abstain but my healing was only possible without the getting, using & recovering from meaningless relationships with men.
Alcoholics Anonymous showed me that my problem was never alcohol, my problem was and still is LIFE. I don’t know how to live. Through a loving relationship with the God of my understanding, a supportive Sponsor, Putting pen to paper in my Stepwork, Camaraderie in Meetings and a lifestyle of Service I am as free as I’ve ever been with hopes of even more freedom being revealed as I continue trudging the Road.
